Moody Blues – Your Wildest Dreams

I spent most of today writing a letter to my father, in responce to the one he wrote a few weeks ago. It took a lot of thought so it took a very long time to write.

I finished reading Dune last night:

Dune, Frank Herbert, 537 pages

Dune is the story of the desert planet of Arrakis’ people recieving their “Messiah” and using the poer given through him to gain freedom from Imperial control of their planet. It’s been made into two movies, and has won many notable awards, and I was very impressed. In a single book Herbert manages to encompass a complex ruling system, a religion, and story to create a very tangible
world. By constantly focusing on the thoughts of various characters he is able to develop the characters quickly and give us a very clear idea of their intents. Very well written, I can see why there are so many sequels though, the storys has only just begun!


Othere than that not much has been happening like usual. Yesterday the power went out where Myk works. He works right next to a Navy base so they think that had something to do with it, it being the 11th and all… they did panic at first of course. Myk ended up coming home in the afternoon for a few hours ’cause there was nothing to do at work… went back around 3 to check if the power had come back on and it had… so he stayed at work til about 7:30 then came home and we had pizza %D! Watched Toy Story 2 ’cause Myk had never seen it and I hadnt seen it in a while.

Oh and a friend of mine is zipping the contents of all his halflife cds and sending me the zip files %D! All i need to do is burn what’s in the zip onto a disk and install it that way… it really will work, apparently he tried it last night %) It’ll be kewl to play Half-Life with some people online %)

But noew I am gonna wander off and do something productive *wanders*

HIM – In Love And Lonely

Well it’s September 11th 2002. A whole year since the worst attack upon American soil in history… somehow it seems like it should feel more profound. I guess if I got out more I’d see the effects of it more… But this day has made me reflect a bit, funny how a terrible event such as this makes one remember most of what they did on that day. This is like “where were you when Kennedy was shot” of the past generation… I think most people can recount the events of the day the World Trade Centers were attacked. I would recount them here, but that would be more boring than my usual blog. But I do remember what I was doing now, at 10 am on the 11th last year, sleeping. See I had spent the previous night breaking up with my ex, and on the way home we got a flat tire, waited 2 hours for help and didn’t get back home until about 8 am, so of course I was sleeping. I didn’t find out about the attacks until noon when my ex came into the room to tell me that our friend was at the door freaking out about some ‘bombing’.

As much as I never said much about the attack, and still downplayed my patriotism as much as I always have I do feel for the lives lost, and the families that had to continue after losing loved ones. A few months ago I wrote up a long boring thing about 9.11 on my website, if you havent seen it, and your are bored you might wanna check it out: 09.11.01.

So the memorials today are centered around the World Trade Center attacks. And sure, the loss of life in those were much more than the loss of life in the Pentagon, but still why do people seem to be avoiding the fact that the Pentagon was attacked at all? At first I thought it was just the Pentagon was a bit ashamed that it let the attack happened, but then my buddy Rubicant had to come down with his Conspiracy theories. Now I’m not one to believe these sorts of things, I don’t believe the moon landing was fabricated in a hollywood basement, or any of those silly things… but this pentagon theory makes more and more sense each time I think about it. It says that the Pentagon was NOT hit by a plane. From what I’ve read a few European countries (including France) are almost positive that this is the truth, but I’ve see pictures of the pentagon after the attack, next to pictures the size of a plane that would have crashed into it and things just dont quite add up. Well you can see for yourself at this french site i found on the whole thing:

http://www.asile.org/citoyens/numero13/pentagone/erreurs_en.htm

*shrugs*

So enough about the whole September 11th thing, we are moving on, recovering from that. So now back to talking about me %P

I had a really bad headache last night… sucked ’cause it started out right before Myk got home, sorta felt like a sinus headache so I took some Advil Migrane (LOVE Advil Migrane… it works wonders). That seemed to make my headache go away until about 10, when it came back, REALLY bad. I was sitting there giving Myk a backrub while he worked on some stuff on his computer and my head started hurting, stomach getting all upset… %( I took summore Advil Migrane and went to lie down… headache didnt go away for about 2 hours… at least that’s when I finally fell asleep. Luckily I don’t have a headache this morning %) Stupid migranes… I hadnt had one for like 6 months tho, so it’s not *so* bad. I don’t know what caused it though. *shrugs*

I guess I’m gonna go try to get some work done noew… *wanders off*

Poe – Haunted

Didn’t end up getting much done today, but i will tomorrow! Yes tomorrow I will, as long as we don’t get bombed or something. That would suck.

The scifi server has been really messed up today… I sorta expected it ’cause since Farscape was cancelled on SciFi people have been coming on the scifi server as a way to speak out against the cancellation and try to reverse it. Well the scifi server is pretty sucky anyway, and so when a server that is used to 150 users has an excess of 400 things are bound to go wrong. Anyway it was quite a mess of disconnecting and reconnecting for about a half hour… very annoying. I am almost afraid to say it’s finished, hehe…

Anyway, I did get a logo finished for the disney part of my site, I know… out of all the time I had today that’s ALL i got done, I am ashamed of it too! But the logo is cute:



Comments? Heh… hopefully the section will be done, at least presentable by the end of the week… we’ll see.

Well I am gonna go wander off and read or something for a little while til Myk gets home *wanders off again*

Peter Murphy – Let Me Love You

I have a tooth ache again, I really should get that looked at %s It just sucks ’cause I dont have insurance, and so it’d be really expensive if it turns out to be a few cavities, or me needing to get my wisdom teef out %( that would suck.

Hmmm anyway I decided I should ignore most of chat today and actually get work done on my site, or something useful ’cause I have been very lazy lately and I think it depresses me o_O

Hmm well I guess I’ll go work on stuff then *wanders off*

Jewel – Enter From The East

I forgot to post a reply to one of the comments… they asked if I was talking about irc… then said they were an mirc junkie. Well I WAS talking about IRC, but I don’t use mirc… why? 1. Because they dont make a linux version 2. because it’s graphical, and I want a text based client to run on my webserver.

I take great offense to being called an mirc user %) and when people confuse IRC with mIRC, mIRC is merely a client to connect to Internet Relay Chat servers. And sure, I have a “how-to install mirc” thing on my site, and I DID use mIRC for a couple years, it’s great for the beginner. The scripting language is simple enough for a child to write and it’s very clicky-pretty. Of course these things are also what gains my contempt for it %) You get lame-ass users on IRC who can script in mIRC and think they are so 1337. Drop them at a command prompt of a unix box and they’d panic of course, but they gain this sort of respect for their scripting abilities by others who don’t realize how easy it really is. And of course you get the lamers who take advantage of all mIRC tools to write floods, nukes, etc that execute through mIRC. I even know some people who control half their computer remotely through mirc, it gets quite absurd %)

So I hate mIRC, and while I am ranting about irc, I hate it when I am in a chat room and people decide to bring in all their half finished bots and commence to have a bot making party where they spend the afternoon messing with their bots! *grumbles at the people doing that now in #brit-cit* it drives away people who actually want to chat, can’t they MAKE a room to do this in? S’how I test my bot.. I never bring him into a room until he is finished because I know how annoying it is for people to test their bots while I am trying to chat… rar.

Oh boy I’m in a bad mood, STUPID MIRC!!! %)

Well Myk fixed my net connection %) yay! So I can post this thing I wrote this morning:
Hooverphonic – Magenta

My connection is icky %( Stupid Comcast… When you are uploading something it just eats up SO much bandwidth. I was surfing the net at like dial up speeds for a while, but things seem to suck pretty bad noew %) *writes this in vim to copy it to xanga later*

So I have no net atm what is there to do? Write a huge xanga entry! Yesterday I spent doing nothing really… read more of Dune… surprisingly I’m already a little over halfway through it. I should be getting my new books in the mail any day now… Hopefully they will come before I finish Dune… If not there is always finishing rereading Return Of The King. I talk about books in my weblog, how dull. I watched Adult Swim last night too… funny stuff even though I’m not a big fan of The Oblongs, or Mission Hill, or Space Ghost Coast to Coast for that matter… Home Movies, Harvey Birdman, The Brak Show, Sealab 2021, and Aqua Teen Hunger Force are great tho %D I guess I watch all of adult swim only because I was drowsy all day (stupid Benadryl) and I probably would have fallen asleep if I kept reading (Adult Swim is on Cartoon Network at 10 on sunday…).

It’s September 9th. Now I know most of the country is getting all prepared for wednesday, and the whole “One Year Anniversary” of the September 11th Terrorist attacks, and that’s perfectly commendable. I tend to think of this time of year a bit differently. Last year on September 10th (as I am sure most of you know) I broke up with my ex-boyfriend, ending a 2 year emotionally abusive relationship that I *still* have dealing with. This was a huge step for me… I never had too much self-esteem, and when you are in a position such as I was you feel like you deserve the way you are being treated. It took a lot of strength for me to break out of that cycle, and I wasn’t sure I had that strength. I had all sorts of support from friends, and used all of them as a rope to pull me out of that situation. The attacks on the 11th only compounded my regret for pushing these very friends away a year before when my ex “told me to stop chatting on scifi”… I realized through the attacks how I could have lost any of them and never have forgiven myself, and how lucky I was. My family also stepped back into my life, as much as I had ignored them as well, right there waiting to help me out again because, after all, family is family. When I finally was out of the whole situation with my ex I realized I had a whole new respect for family and friends, and for myself… self respect is eternally important, and as I can still see my flaws, and my weaknesses better than anyone, I realize that dispite these things, I still deserve respect and REAL love… afterall no one is perfect.

That’s what this time of year will eternally mean for me I guess… a sort of rebirth of myself. It was at this time I came back to chat with all my old friends, got back into contact with my family, and renewed my love for everything computers. I had a new strength and feeling of self worth, and couldn’t believe that I survived without having it before. After leaving my ex I moved in with my aunt. I was already dating my long-time friend Myk by then, it was a long-distance relationship but I needed some time to resolve my ‘issues’ with my ex, a few months of freedom and continual self-discovery. Of course I wanted to take longer, but November rolled around, and Myk came up to see me and my family (aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents on my mothers side) for Thanksgiving, and everyone loved him, including me. And although I was cautious at first I finally admitted that I needed to be with him. I took a chance and in December last year I moved here to Philly. And of course everyone knows how good that has been going since I hardly shut up about it %P Anyway… yeah, this time of year is profound %)

So it looks like my net connection completely died. Not the net connection exactly, the gateway box still has a few bugs, and all the file upload must have made it get it’s frooze on. So no internet for me today. Gah… I wish I knew more about networking %) I might be able to fix this myself.. but Myk really is the one best suited for this all. The worst part about it really is I don’t have mp3s %( I can live without being online for a day as long as I have my computer, there are lots of things I should be doing to my system that I put off ’cause I’m lazy. Unfortunately for me all the tutorials I have are online so I can’t spend the day catching up on stuff I havent been doing while I spent my time looking for a house. Oh boy I’m rambling.

I guess I’ll start off the morning by writing some long due emails to some friends, I put them off so much that it becomes months between emails and I really shouldn’t let that happen. Laters.

So the better thing to do was surf the net and stumble upon funny things, like this for example:

*sneezes* ugh… stupid alleriges! I don’t really have anything exciting to write about… Myk redit the firewall this weekend and now I can’t dcc from local chat clients, heh… s’ok I dont dcc much from here anyway, my chat clients mostly are on the webserver…

Its sunday… as i pretty much expected we arent doing anything this weekend… i’m about 100 pages into Dune, read til about 3 am last night, Myk didnt come to bed til around 6, heh… Dune is a really good book %) I cant believe I never read it before… after this I am going to NEED to get some of the books following it. I definately need to get to a used bookstore, buying new books all the time is quite costly %) and I am SURE most of the books I am reading will be available used.

Anyway, I am sure there are better things I could be doing than writing here *wanders off*

I finished the 5th Wheel of Time book today… review:

The Fires Of Heaven, By Robert Jordan, 989 pages

This book still follows our cast as they get even more into their fight with the evil Forsaken.. we learn a lot more about these Forsaken in this book, their powers and limitations. Our Hero Rand, the Dragon rebord, also grows a lot in this book… the effects of being “partly” Lews Therin takes a toll most noticibly here. Mat also deals with past memories that are not his own, these memories recieved when he journeyed into Rhiuidean with Rand, and these are explored in a little more depth and we finally see their uses. The White Tower splits further and makes the mission of the young Accepteds Elayne and Nynaeve a bit more difficult. Perrin fans would be diasspointed to note that his story is not part of this book, besides casual references to his well-being by other characters. In all Jordan continues to do a good job keeping the reader’s interest and revealing secrets that give much more depth to each character.

I started reading Dune this afternoon ’cause I hadnt yet and it’s one of those scifi books that everyone just HAS to read…

I woke up pretty early this morning surprisingly, tried to sleep more until i finally got up around 10ish.. read the last 200 or so pages of the 5th WoT book, then had a bit of a sinus headache so I was lying down for a good bit of the afternoon.. which sucked. Sometimes I think I’d rather be sick in any other way other than a headache… at least with an upset stomach I can watch tv, or read, or even use the computer… with a headache I just need to take lots of medicine and wait it out by lying in bed, bleh, so boring…

I dunno if we’ll do anything this weekend… s’ok if we don’t I guess, it’s been nice out lately so I can get out to take walks, and I guess I can settle for that as “getting out of the house” Heh… the house hunt still goes on. We’re gonna call next week to see how much of a loan we can get approved for, fun fun! Then we can seriously get down to business with buying a house… we’re still really want a fireplace and loft, but it’s just so hard to find. At least with a loan approved we can find our house and be sure to get it … and hopefully be able to move before the lease is up here in december.

I did a little playing around with the mp3 collection yesterday… we moved them to another computer (since one of clockbot’s harddrives was dying, we got the mp3s off of it luckily). I moved all the mp3s from my computer (r2) their new home on Minute, I still need to go through them and fix the names of a few so they are all pretty, but I generated a new list for my site in the meantime… we counted them at like 1557 mp3s %D anyway the list is here:

http://www.princessleia.com/mp3s.txt


Now I’m gonna go waste some time chatting %D *wanders off*

Fisher – Miseryland

Wow, I’m listening to lots of chick music today o_O

I finally got Neocron to start downloading, decided to go to a download site other than stupid FilePlanet… maybe Fileplanet is better if you pay for their freaking yearly subscription, but somehow I doubt it %) I ended up going to some German site, I’m downloading at 108 k/sec %D Still it’s gonna take like 3 hours, lol… I’m already at 47 % tho %) Hopefully I’ll be able to find some time this afternoon to play a little… more important hopefully I will like it, lol

SO i guess I can stop bitching about Network Solutions so much… I found out today when i got an email from them that their site is all broekn ’cause they are redoing stuff, and it’ll work to my advantage. They are sending me a password in the REAL MAIL to the “new and improved” account manager, so I’ll be able to change my secondary dns FINALLY. It should be here in about 2 weeks. I also emailed Nikole (the former owner of princessleia.com..) to see if she refaxed the request to change the ownership COMPLETELY to me.. she did once but netsol and their wonderfulness lost it %) At least with this new password I’ll be able to make the changes I need… Since the secondary dns that is listed is from a provider that went out of business last month %)

My allergies are really bugging me today.. it’s funny I never had allergies since I spent the summer down here in ’99… I am not sure if it was there are different plants and stuff here that make me sneeze or just another one of those things that happens when you get older. Lots of things have happened to my health in the past couple years, like my asthma has almost completely gone away, only once every few months I wake up (usually when I have a cold or something) with my chest hurting…. and I have always had problems with dairy, but it’s only recently that I really became lactose intolerate where I do have stomach problems if I eat too much…. And then there is the whole “caffine doesnt affect me” thing, when I was in high school I could drink 3 cups of coffee before going to bed and not sleep any differently… now if I have pepsi with a 9 pm dinner I can’t fall asleep… Stupid dumb growing up… Speaking of growing up we got a cutting board last night when we were grocery shopping, just like real adults! LOL %)

So I found a picture of what my old desk looked like when I lived at home, I forgot what a horrible mess it was, so for your viewing pleasure I share:

In comparison, this is what my desk looks like now:



Yeah, same computer…

Anyway, I am gonna go see if I can get some work done today… since it’s already almost 1:30, heh… *wanders off again*