I hate these things… but alas, I’m bored.

Oh the sentimental side of life! You are the fourth finger, the ring finger as it is sometimes known as. You value emotions and the small sentimentalities of life. Especially dreams of that you-know-who…

Which finger are you?
Take the quiz to find out.

Oh god how awfully sappy… hehehe

I’m the most well known penguin of them all, always looking great and eating daintily. I’m not too threatened by man, but boy those seals do scare me! I love the cold-cold of the Artic!

Take the What Penguin am I? Quiz by Krysten!

That’s just too cute, hehehhee

So I am in a lousy mood again. Maybe it’s because of the rainy weather (er at least it was rainy last time I checked, like 3 hours ago). Still it’s all cloudy out… and although I used to love rainy weather I think now it might make me feel more trapped, unfortunately I know if I had a car I’d just be bored AND spending money and wasting gas getting lost.

So in an attempt to alleviate my boredom I *finally* got around to doing something with Princessleia2.com. That’s the domain that Myk bought for me back in September before we were dating, and since I got Princessleia.com I sorta just put a huge message on princessleia2 saying I had abandoned it and to go to princessleia.com. Well considering I was being snobby by having TWO domains and not using them (ah most people dont even have one) I thought I should do something with it, ’cause it was just a waste of space. So I pretty much deleted everything on it this morning (it’s all on princessleia.com now so I didnt really need it). Then I made Princessleia2.com into an about me page… Damn, is that even *More* snobby? Nah it’s just self centered. Hmm, what *was* I supposed to do with a domain that is my online nickname? I was gonna turn it into the #13thHour page, but then I remembered that I am letting it expire in september so that would be dumb. Anyway, it’s not like anyone will go to the page anyway… but just in case it’s better than an abandoned page. I’m rambling. But when I mentioned the #13thHour page I wandered over to see if 13thHour.com or anything like it was available yet… 13th-hour.org is… but I dunno… maybe I should just wait a couple more years, hehe, seeing as 13thhour.org is a strange bible ministry site (really, go see for yourself).

So in other exciting news, I am using the oven for the first time today… see it’s a new oven, only about a month old.. I making myself some little pizzas for lunch out of rolls and some tomato sauce and mozerella cheese. I really didnt want fake pizza like that… I could have gone for some nice papa johns delivery… but dispite the amount of money at my disposal it’s all in the bank, no cash… I think delivery places should take credit cards, like over the phone when you place your order you can pay then, it would make things much nicer, because then I’d have real pizza. And papa johns has a nice “order online” thing, it would be SO easy for them to accept credit cards through that! And while I’m at it, all chinese places should deliver, I know that some do, but never any that I live around %(! Ah, this wouldnt be such a problem if I just had a car, or decent public transportation.

*Sighs and eats her homemade pizza* So anyway, it’s friday again… which is good ’cause Myk will be home with me all weekend and I wont get so lonely. It seems like that’s all I ever have to look forward to. I was thinking this morning (well I think this a lot) about how much of a failure I am. Not in the “oh man I suck *cry*” way, but in the contributing member of society way. I keep trying to convince myself that I am learning lots of stuff that I’ll “someday apply to computer related projects I’ll work on” … but I’ve been unemployed for over 6 months, and my skills are barely better than they were when I had a job. So then I try to justify my staying home by saying “oh women didnt work much out of the at all before the whole womens rights stuff!” But then I try to think about what women did do, and I picture my grandmother, who did TONS of volunteer work and was a prominent person in the community, but she always had been.. was head cheerleader and all that *sigh* … so then I think of what it is to be a “homemaker” now-a-days and I cant escape the stereotypical “sitting in a trailer part with curlers and fluffy pink slippers and bathrobe watching soaps all day” … and that’s not me at all either. I guess I’ll go back to telling everyone I am learning programming languages so someday if i need a job I’ll get one in that sort of field. But then there is the whole college thing. Sure I want to improve my math skills, sure a college degree would be nice… but if I am just gonna do independent developing with only a chance of getting a job, how will I pay off my college debts? I certainly cant leave that to Myk… Ugh, it’s so frustrating!!! At least I’ll be 21 soon so I wont need my parents for anything anymore…

Anyway, I have rambled enough… *wanders off*

I saw this on Leslie2003’s xanga site so I took the quiz… how the hell? Lol. Silly…

This one was kinda humorous tho:








Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You? quiz, by Angel.




It’s quite comical how these quizzes contradict each other so.

Well I went for a walk.. even got a little adventurous and walked down a couple trails I had never been down before, it was very interesting. One of them was an overgrown trail that was obviously hardly used that went down to a little stream where it stopped. This seemed very odd to me, but none the less, the stream was pretty cool… lots of little fishies in it, and those bugs that jump across the surface of the water, yeah, they’re cool. So after watching the stream for a few minutes, I wandered back to where the trail split off and walked down another part I had never been down… The coolest part of this trail was all the little wooden bridges over empty streams, I guess it hasnt rained enough. Well this trail ended with a road… with no visable extention of the trail on the other side of the road. I sighed and walked back, noticing the wonderful sign about cleaning up after your dog, and the $100 fine if you dont (this is so dull…). So finally I got back to my normal trail and wandered the rest of the way around back to my apartment. I was feeling ok when I got back, listening to “Strange Kind Of Love” ’cause that song is just so perfect. I opened the windows when I got back ’cause it was starting to get warm since I shut them to go on the walk. Then I sat back down here at the computer and looked into chat. I hadn’t missed anything… I had been gone for like a half hour and no one had spoken. I got a lame ass ICQ message from some person asking if I wanted to chat about quantum physics… maybe my interest in abstract quantum physics is still in my profile? In any event I am sick of weirdos IM’ing me so I just closed the window.. plus I’m in a pretty lousy mood, so I am sure that has something to do with it.

Oh! I do have some good news (no way!). I got a letter from my pen pal in england last night. It was cool getting a real paper letter for once. See I sent her a letter maybe a month ago… I hadnt written in over 2 years, and had hoped that she still used the same address. Turns out her and her husband have a business at that address and they used to live above it, so luckily she got my letter. I guess she’s been well… she has a son now and he’s almost 2, he was born on my father’s birthday, heh, I thought that was kinda cool. Anyway, it was cool hearing from her, maybe I’ll go write her a letter back, since it takes so long for the letter to get to England. I think I am going to try to keep in close contact with her again, because it really is cool getting real life letters, hehe.

Right, so I’ll go write her a letter now…

Ugh… I’m freaking bored. S’one of those terrible depressive boredoms that makes me wanna go take a nap, I hate that. Moods where all I feel like doing is sleeping suck. *Yawn*

So last night for dinner I tried to make eggplant parmasean… it didnt turn out too bad.. just the eggplant wasnt as cooked as I could have hoped *sigh* luckily Myk likes it not completely cooked to death. Well, while I was finishing eating we were starting to watch Law and Order and my little sister called. Frustrated, I took the call and she was all complaining about how her computer wasnt working right *ugh* … she told me what the problem was and turns out she has a pretty nasty worm on her system, and of course no virus scan software. Plus she doesnt know how it got on there. Luckily my other sister heather is going up to visit today… I asked heather to backup annette’s files and reinstall windows n stuff, since the worm had pretty much taken over the computer by then. She’s gonna install norton antivirus on it, and hopefully they will be smart enough to keep up on the updates! … The phone call with annette was interesting though, at one point I asked what it said on her cd rom drive (i didnt know if they had a cdrw to backup files with)… and she was like “what is a cd-rom drive?” oy!!! Talk about making my job hard… I will never become a help desk techie, helping my sister is one thing… helping a whole fleet of people who dont know what a cd-rom drive is is a completely different one entirely. In any event I hope Heather can sucessfully reinstall everything… and maybe someday my family will learn to use virus scan software once they realize how hard it is to reinstall a system! In any event I’m waiting by the phone for a call from Heather telling me she screwed up the windows install.

NEXT! I was talking to a friend of mine from online last night, and she told me about this site where she posted some of her poetry… and it’s a pretty cool site, you can get feedback from your poems n stuff from other users *shrugs* it’s kinda cool to get positive feedback from people sometimes. So I posted some of mine up there… they are all pretty old, from when I was pretty depressed n stuff, so it’s all pretty much typical “teenage loneliness and depression” things.. oh well.. if anyone is interested they are at http://www.postpoems.com/members/pleia2/. I spent a good part of the morning this morning wandering around reading other people’s poems, ’cause I was bored then too… There are some really good amature poets out there. I wrote some reviews, of some poems I liked, I think the reason for that was completely selfish though, if I write reviews then people will come to my poetry site and read mine… yep… selfish. Oh well. Maybe I’ll be in the mood to write some poems today… since I dont have any recent ones. I guess my problem is that I can only write when I’m depressed about something in particular, so at times like, say, now when I am not depressed about anything really I end up writing random stuff, and then throwing it away because I am depressed and convinced it sucks… make sense? Hehe… I wish it was the weekend.

So I’m listening to some Stabbing Westward, because they just rock, and of course since I am a bad fan I dont have any of their cds. And I am cheap, and mp3s are just so much easier than getting up and going to the store where there are people and buying a cd… true I could order online, but when I want to listen to a song I want to listen to it now, not in 2 weeks when they decide to ship it to me. Ah, how american.

Anyway, I am gonna go wander off, maybe take a walk (so much for waiting by the phone for that phone call from my sis saying she broek windows). I dont wanna sit around here anymore. Maybe I’ll come home and write a poem later, if I do, and it’s decent, I’ll post it here.

*Grabs Peter Murphy’s “Deep” from Myk’s cd collection and wanders off for a walk”

I’ve been slacking on this lately, ah maybe I’ll make up for it today %)

I didnt mention yesterday that I finished Tales from Watership Down, I was even too sleepy yesterday afternoon to write a review on it, so I wrote it today :

Tales From Watership Down, By Richard Adams, 262 pages

I read this because I needed a break after The Image Makers
before beginning another series of books. Getting on with it, it was a
fairly simple book, reading wise, I just read it for the story really
since I had read Watership Down like a zillion years ago. It
turned out to be pretty good… told the stories of El-ahrairah, the
“prince with a thousand ememies” … the “father” among rabbits. It also
continued the story a bit of the rabbits of Watership Down’s new
warren… and backtracks a bit to tell stories of their adventures,
since arriving there. It’s a must read for anyone who has read
Watership Down … s’really cute %) and expands on some of the
more interesting stories alluded to in the original novel.

I just started reading David Eddings’ “The Malloreon” 5 book series, ’bout 50 pages into the first book, and dispite the first chapter being a bit heavy (apparently there was a series before it, but I’m not about to go and buy it.. I dont think I could handle 10 books of the same story, besides, it’s not *that* important, most people who have read this havent read the first series, since it wasnt as good..). Anyway, it’s pretty good so far.

I went for a walk up to the store today.. fun fun, I guess it’s good to go out into civilization a couple times a week tho, hehehe… this ‘net life is sorta sheltered in it’s own way (ie no real life social interaction!!), anyway we didnt have any bread in the house, what could I do? Hehe… When I walked up there I brought the diskman, and just randomly picked up “Pretty Hate Machine” to listen too. I guess I realized on the walk up there that it was by far my favorite CD. I guess I had known that all along, and it’s kinda obvious from the casual observer that I have listened to it a few million times, because the case is pretty broken… I often say that it’s been with me to hell and back. And it’s pretty cool’cause Myk was a NIN admirer back in the day! I guess he picked up Pretty Hate Machine when NIN was opening for someone (I think he said it was Peter Murphy… I cant remember)… but obviously since NIN was the opening band they werent exactly a discovered band yet! Anyway, it got me to thinking about what the essential cds were in my collection, and i made a big list… then narrowed it down to 10 that I thought were especially needed %)

I guess these are in no particular order… ‘cept Pretty Hate Machine… which definately goes on top!

Ah Pretty Hate machine… top of my list because NIN rocks my worldy-poo, and I love the raw great sound of this album… although I am also partial to The Fragile, but I thought only one cd per band on this list would be good %) YAY nin!!! The sound, the words… mmm expression of that inner hate/aggression/frustration/temptation that we all feel at one time or another.

Next on my list is Miranda Sex Garden’s “Carnival Of Souls”. It’s their most recent release, and as the band has progressed they have sorta gone from 16th century short songs… to a 21st century sorta gothish sound that is really breathtaking %) I’ll upload an mp3 of my fave song of theirs sometime if anyone is interested… *Hugs the cd*

Massive Attack – Mezzanine is my favorite Massive Attack cd… and although I guess I wouldnt consider myself a die hard fan (I am not too fond of some of their olders songs with a sorta hip hop element…). Anyway, Mezzanine has a good number of really great songs on it, and when I’m in the mood I really need a cd like this… Teardrop, Angel, Dissolved Girl… Oh and Inertia Creeps! oh and all the rest ;) I’m loving it…



One of the two soundtracks on this list, The X-Files: The Album is really great, although Songs In The Key Of X is pretty good too.. and of course all of Mark Snow’s work just rocks, this album for the movie definately tops them all.. s’got some Filter, Soul Coughing, Bjork, The Cure… ah the list goes on %) A lot of really good stuff on this, I listen to this album quite often %)

Ah while I am on the subject of soundtracks I guess I’ll go to the Great Expectations Soundtrack. Yep, good movie, good soundtrack… S’got a bunch of songs about being used, losing love, and being in frustration over a “crush” of sorts. In any event it’s a bunch of great songs…

Ok… next… this Supreme Beings Of Leisure, self titled, album. Hmmm, I remember I was in a cd store and it was one of those cds that had headphones you could listen to it through, I listened to it and I just happened to be in one of those “depressed, must spend money” moods. So I picked it up, and I havent been disappointed %) It’s a really good, dispite being somewhat popular ;) I made mp3s of the whole thing soon after getting it.. and I listen to them quite often…

Noew I get to my favorite Bjork album… now this decision wasnt easy! I have all her albums… including Selma Songs, the soundtrack from Dancer in the Dark… as well as two or three singles, AND a SugarCubes cd. Anyway, I finally narrowed it down to Post. Yep, Post is my favorite Bjork album, for many reasons… Although I really do like the more electronic direction she was taking in Verspertine. %) So being as Bjork is so cool, and I love her so much, of course one of her albums had to be in this list!



So at first I wasnt sure I liked Cake, I think I started to like them when I heard the cover of “I Will Survive” … now I’m a fool for covers you see, and after hearing that, and liking it, I thought it would be worth it to take a better look at Cake. Then I discovered how cool they were… and I got Fashion Nugget actually after I bought their really popular one… what was it… uh… oh yes! Prolonging the Magic. And I can definately say that I liked Fashion Nugget much more %) Hmmm still havent bought Comfort Eagle %(!!! I do like short skirt/long jacket tho… Anyway, Cake is the kind of band I can listen too when I’m in a good mood and want to sing along, hehe, shutup! %) And it’s good to take on walks, because the words are really great, and clear… so I can zone off to them

Oook.. who is next… Ah, The Cure, 17 Seconds… This took a lot of careful consideration… ’cause I really love Paris too… oh and Disintegration.. not to mention that cd of their singles… Galore! But in the end… I decided 17 Seconds is my favorite… ‘specially Forest… and M … yay the Cure! I just love the Cure… so of course one of their albums is essential %)


Lastly… Peter Murphy rocks! I didnt “discover” exactly who this artist was until a few months ago when I was looking through Myk’s mp3s.. and he is so great %) My fave album of his is “Deep” mmm lots of good songs here! Love love love it… even listening to mp3s from it atm %) So everyone should go out and buy Deep noew…



Oh … I guess that’s 10

Myk and I went for a walk again last night, it was nice… saw some rabbits %) and dark since we went out around 9 pm… Hopefully we can make thsi a habit while the weather is nice %)

I didn’t sleep too well last night, the worst in weeks, I dunno what’s up. I thought my insomnia was pretty under control with this normal sleep schedule (I had been taking tylenol pm everynight for a couple months, and that helped me get into a decent schedule). *sigh* maybe it was just a couple weeks lapse of normal sleeping and I’m going back to the whole insomnia thing. And after I got so used to not being tired!

Anyway, today I did get a bit of work done. I moved my webpage to our new webserver n stuff… unfortunately (well it’s a good thing in the long run) we might not even be using that box now! Bleh… maybe all that work was wasted! But it gave me something productive to do. I also took a walk, even tho it was like 90 degrees outside with 50% humidity *shrugs* I got frustrated and wanted to take a walk. It was nice I guess… refreshing in a way, listened to Cake while I was walking…

Ugh… I am too tired to write! Maybe more later…

Ah another day… I got lots of laundry done and vacuumed the apartment, woohoo! Oh and wrote like, a 18k email to a friend of mine, ah how longwinded I can be in my emails! Of course his email to me was quite long too, hehe. Anyway.. I also went processor and motherboard shopping… errr window shopping, and realized that I need to know more about motherboards and processors before I go and buy a new one for my computer (r2d2). From what it looks like so far though, it seems I will probably get a 1.2 ghz processor, pentium 3 ’cause a lot of the motherboards for those can handle pc-133 ram… and since Myk *just* bought me that ram a couple months ago, I dont want to have to replace it, besides, that would cost too much! I am figuring it should cost about $200 for the upgrade I want, so that’s well within my budget. It’s gonna be kinda funny though, since I am doing this I will have replaced most of my computer! New ram, additional harddrive, soundcard and dvd rom drive are gonna be replaced (eventually, with the better ones in clockbot).. and of course Myk upgraded my video card for christmas %) I think the only original parts will be the powersource, the original harddrive (which I use as an extra noew), the case, and my floppy drive, hehe, even the ethernet card has been replaced!

In other computer news, Myk and I are moving our webpages over to the new server this week, since we are losing the box we have (the company is going out of business… sigh). It’ll be nice though, because it’s a cute little Dell, and we are going to be able to upgrade PHP Nuke, which we couldnt do on the colbalt. So everything will be more secure, and pretty and new!

Ok enough computer stuff, ’cause I am sure most/all of the people who read this dont even understand half of what I just said %) Last night was pretty nice. I finally took Myk on the mile long trail around the apartment complex, he was really surprised (as I was) with all the pretty woods behind the complex that the trail follows. I’m glad he likes to take walks like that %) He likes to hike too, hopefully we can do some of that up in the Poconos this summer, that’d be so much fun! I think I’d die if I didnt live near lots of trees %)

Hmmm, other than that… I guess I am done writing for today.. buh bye!

I just finished reading The Image Makers, by Bernard Dryer. I posted a review on my website, but I am gonna try to make a habit of posting them here as well. so here it is:

I guess the only reason I read this book was ’cause it was on my bookshelf and I hadn’t read it yet. I’m not quite sure where I got it or when, but it’s at least 40 years old, and definately not the kind of book I’d usually read, according to the cover there was a movie made of it too. Anyway, it was a story mostly about an American doctor and a rich sub Arab (Berber) beauty, and it takes place in the 1950’s, just a few years after the second world war. Their story of love, money,death, and politics takes the reader through a very interesting world that few of us have access too. I am not quite sure I liked it, but I can admire the interesting forwards and backwards in time in which it was written. The author would show a scene, then the character remembering, say, the past week’s events, and then tell it through memories until it got back to that first scene. If you get what I mean.. It is potentially a very confusing way to write a book, but the author did a very good job of putting it together so that you barely notice. I guess if you are into more “real life” .. and/or a glimpse into the world of the beautiful and rich europeans/arabs of that time, with a bit of romance and self discovery then this is the book for you… as for me, I am wandering back to fantasy/scifi land.

I am gonna try to find a new book to read *searches her bookshelf* Hmm… I have read most of these! Ah…Tales From Watership Down, I read Watership Down centuries ago (hehe) and never got around to reading this one. Hmmm well since I have it I guess I’ll give it a shot, should be a nice rest before tackling David Eddings 5 book series I still have on my shelf, hehe (ok, so 4 of the 5 books.. where is #4?). Yeah… I will read this, short and easy, hehe, and cute! %)

We had yummie swordfish for dinner tonight –<>< <-- a swordfish. It was sooo yummie, and we had cheese too, gouda and some wendsleydale (like wallace and gromit eat!!). It was all really yummie. Anyway... that's prolly all for today %)

*Wanders off to read*

Ah well yesterday didnt turn out to be as boring as I thought it would be %) We ended up going out to buy some new musik (Myk was disappointed with the last album he bought and wanted to get something new)… and went to Borders, but their ambient section isnt the greatest, so we didnt get anything. Then since it was such a nice day out (70s and sunny) he suggested a walk around the lake… Then, while making a joke about being indecisive suggested we go up to the Poconos, where his mother’s boyfriend has a place. We came home and called them, and they said they’d be up there, so around 4 we headed up to the mountains. We went up and had dinner at this cute little restaurant up there, and then went to his mom’s boyfriend’s cottage, it was sooo nice up there! There were rabbits, and squirrels and deer… it was really cool. The ride up there was only about 1 1/2 hours… we should do that more often %)

We rented The Others and From Hell last night, I had already seen From Hell (Of course, johnny!) but hadnt seen The Others and heard it was good… We watched them last night, it was nice, we even had a fire in the fireplace again and all the windows open %) Ended up going to bed after 2 am, it ended up being a nice day tho %)

I guess we’re going out to get some fish now, we’re gonna try the ‘ole grill again, hehe… the weekend went by so fast!