Just a few weeks ago I had never even heard Jimmy Eat World, but now I have grown to rather like them. And I only have 4 of their mp3s… and since Audiogalaxy went all gay on me I can’t get more… maybe I can find a friend to leech some from, or if all else fails I’ll boot into windows and spend some time downloading a few tracks, but only as a last resort %)

Hmm… I hate when I think of all sorts of things to write here and then I get into this little box and forget all of it… Ah, yes, yesterday I started fighting with getting the xchat Perl script for r2d2 to work in irssi, gah… irssi is so confusing %( If only they used basic normal IRC things I’d be so happy! But they dont of course, have to make it all confusing so I play with it for three hours and all I end up with is 3 hours of errors… I guess I’ll try to work on summore of it today *shrugs* I think I just get frustrated too easily and then I scream it’s impossible %) A very bad habit. Hopefully it’s possible for me to be smart enough to make the script work in irssi… I am still optimistic (although I doubt I will be this afternoon after working on it for a while.

Heh… I just talked to my sister and another one of the chinchillas died… Whiskerz, Annette’s favorite chinchilla %( He had been sick… an infected tooth that needed to be removed. I guess they had a date for the surgery, but he just didn’t last that long %( *sigh* this is depressing… wonderful way to start a day… i’d put a picture up but it seems no one has a picture of him… annette might but they dont have a scanner.

I’m gonna go wander off, this news hasnt put me in a good mood… %(

I’m not sure why I started feeling depressed yesterday. It was really strange… see I was wandering around reading people’s xanga sites ’cause I was bored.. and started feeling like a serious loser ’cause other people put up kewl stuff about their lives and fun stuff they were doing.. and I put up a couple silly book reviews.. I started thinking about how pathetically nerdy that was… I am not sure why that made me depressed, I usually like it when people call me a geek *shrugs* maybe it was a bit of the “society’s view of what I should be” creeping in and making me feel like I wasnt living up to the expectations of a woman my age… er something. Anyway, Myk came home from work… and we spent a really nice evening together.. not that that’s much different from other evenings, but I realized I was really happy, and I shouldnt be depressed because of what I do enjoy, as geeky as it should seem.

So now that that’s done with, I guess I should move on… Last night when Myk came home he found a package in our mailbox. He was surprised and then read that it was from a friend of ours online, in Belgium! I gave him our address a few months back (btw, anyone crazy enough can easily get my address by doing a whois on my domain… so I am not too scared about giving it out to friends, at least they asked instead of being devious about it). But he didn’t give any indication that he actually sent anything. So we opened the box and he sent us a couple cans of Belgian beer, a bunch of yummie yummie chocolate, a cd-r with The Crow on it (’cause I had never seen it, and he had a copy), a cd-r with a bunch of mp3s, a euro coin, and a hand-written letter. It was really cool %) We drank the beer during dinner, it was good, better than american beer anyway. And the chocolate… ooooo… mmmmm… sooo mmmm good %d I went ahead and found the website this morning, and took their little “chocolate lovers quiz” … found out that I “Undoubtedly you belong to the great family of: Melted Milk Pleasure-Seekers” hehe… so true (% the site is www.cotedor.com, because I know you are interested %P Anyway our friend from Belgium (his name is Nick… but his online name is Yann … s’too weird to call him Nick, lol) is in France for a few days, watching a cycling thing… ’cause I guess he likes cycling, er something. We kept making fun of him saying he likes to watch men wearing spandex. But we’re gonna have to thank him TONS when he gets back %) it was such a nice surprise. We were trying to think of things to send him from here… since he’s using us as his door the learning more about the US, but we can’t seem to think of anything that’s so US specific AND good (everything from the US sucks, beer, chocolate… hehe). So if anyone reading this, if anyone reads this has any suggestions I’d really appreciate the input.

So I watched The Crow this morning, it was much better than I expected… I was anticipating some lame ass teen goth movie or something I guess (hey I was drawing from the ppl I knew that were big worshippers of this movie). But it really turned out to be an interesting story n stuff.. I can imagine how sequels would suck tho, they ARE probably lousy teen goth movies %) But this first one I did enjoy.. I started listening to some of the mp3s he sent too, but then I decided to go clean up the house a bit ’cause I was feeling lazy… Besides, Myk finished up a rough version (if you could call it that, it sounds fine to me…) of his latest Ambient mix, and I was downloading it to listen to it.. so I’m listening to that now, it’s really good %) I guess I have to try to give him summore time alone to work on making it perfect, hehe.

So I guess it was when I was feeling depressed yesterday I was surfing through some websites from this linux chicks site (I think I was looking for others like me so I wouldnt feel so sad, hehe). I stumbled upon this one girl’s site that had some quake 2 instructions for getting it to run on linux… so I was bored so I decided to check them out even though I have no current intention of installing quake 2… and toward the end of the description she mentioned that the brightness controls built into the game dont work in linux so you needed to adjust xgamma before you ran the game… I was like… wtf is xgamma? So I typed it into a terminal… apparently by adjusting the color levels in xgamma you can make your screen brighter or darker! This is exactly what I needed to make my screen bright enough to play UT!!! I was so excited %) I ended up writing a shell script to execute to start UT and change the gamma settings (I make it pretty bright for UT… and those brightness settings are a little too much for my typical desktop). So the script sets the xgamma higher when I go into UT… and then sets it back to normal when I exit UT, s’pretty cool… and a dreadfully basic script, but it does work, and now I can stop complaining about my old monitor, hehe

Anyway, today I want to start getting my bot’s script ported to irssi… it runs on xchat currently, off my own computer. Which means I have to keep x running all the time, and when I reboot, restart x, turn off my computer for any reason, the bot goes too… and if i wanted to go to windows, for some reason, I’d have to launch the old mirc bot… besides, my cable connection is unstable, and the bot is required in the room to give voice to people on the friend list. Anyway, I’m gonna go do that noew… laterski.

I know I said I was going to do some work on stuff… but for some reason i sorta got depressed and started feeling geeky and loser-like… bleh, stupid mood… anyway I decided to do some of these silly things…:

You are Morgana! With your powerful magic skills, you could have been an unbeatable supervillain; unfortunately, you fell head over heels for your adversary and are now working for the good guys. Shame, shame. Take the Darkwing Duck Villain Quiz by contessina_2000@yahoo.com!

which beatles song are you?
this quiz was made by janel

Which Lilo & Stitch Character Are YOU?

Find out now! Only from the Quiz Junkie


^^ hehe, stitch

Ok I guess that’s it ’cause I’m really wasting time.. and this isnt cheering me up… bleh

I wasn’t online much this weekend, time spent online was pretty much spent chatting and catching up on email so I never got a chance to write anything. I was in a crankie mood anyway, heh… saturday I spend like, the whole day reading, ’cause Myk needed to get work done here in the computer room so I wandered off so not to distract him. Anyway, I finished one book (and series, since it was the last book in the Malloreon series) and read another… it was a productive day %) I wrote up the reviews too…:

Guardians Of The West, King Of Murgos, Demon Lord Of
Karanda, Sorceress Of Darshiva, The Seeress Of Kell,
By David Eddings, 438 pages, 403 pages, 404 pages, 371 pages, and
374pages respectively

This series, “The Malloreon” tells of the quest of King Belgarion and a
close-knit group of friends and family. He is the Child of the Light and
is destined to confront Zandramas, the Child of the Dark, to decide the
fate of all the world. A fantasy tale complete with Kings, Queens,
Theives, Sorcery and Evil, these books take you on an extrordinary
journey. The story spans the whole world and vastly changes all the
characters involved, including a few “divine” changes… I was really
impressed with how well the characters were developed, when reading this
book I was helplessly lost in their world, I felt like I knew these
characters, a feeling that more than once stayed with me even after
putting the book down for the night. I would recommend this series to
any fantasy fan because to me, it seems to be one of those “staple”
series’ you just must read. Eddings is truly amazing!

Wilhelm Reich In Hell, By Robert Anton Wilson, 164 pages

This book is a play that depicts Wilhelm Reich, a radical psychologist
and philosopher in a circus themed court, trying to express his views
and prove his sanity. In 1957 his books were ceased by the US Government
and burned, because at the time his views were seen as dangerous to
society. A year later he died in prison. This play expresses his views
by making one see the fundamental, if not unavoidable, flaws in modern
society, or the “Emotional Plague”. Reich believed that all physical
sickness was linked to this Emotional Place, and could be cured with
treatment of the mind. He was deemed insane, and in this play he fights
that off, saying he is not the one who is dangerous and insane, the
governments are, the governments are “building the bombs” not him!
Although I don’t agree with everything Reich believed, I was truly
impressed with the way this play described his beliefs, it really gets
the reader (or audience) to see where he was coming from, what his
beliefs stemmed from, so one is able to play with the ideas he is
proposing… Mixed with humor and utter seriousness it keeps the reader
involved and focused. The introduction to the written play, 3
introductions really, are aimed at getting the reader of the play to
look at the play objectively, without the natural adversion to these
believes, or particular “glosses”. This was acheived very well I think.
In any event, this book made me think quite a bit about how I look at
myself and the world around me.

Sunday was much the same I’m afraid… although Myk did stop working in the evening so we could spend some time together %) Ended up watching some TV (tv is just an excuse to cuddle and do nothing you see…). We watched this movie called “Door To Door” .. I was sceptical, but it turned out to be a really touching movie, as far as made for tv movies go anyway. Then watched adult swim on the cartoon network… that’s always entertaining, hehe.

So today… I got up and after talking to a friend online this weekend I added his link to my links section, then realized that my links section was really big.. so I moved all the links of my friends to a separate page. I linked it all up to my site this afternoon… so wanna see some kewl sites made by my friends? Go here. I havent done much else today, playing around with some of Gimp’s perl scripts… chatting some… oh my friend Eric (the one in art school who is making a comic for my site) talked to me today, he wrote out a script finally for the first few weeks of the comic, yay! He sent it to me and it’s really funny… He’s trying to order a computer from dell today (dell’s ordering over the phone process sucks SO bad.. he’s spending over 3 grand and he’s kept on hold…). Well when he gets the computer he’s going to start work on the comic…so hopefully my site will have some comic by september… Art takes a long time and he wants to have a few weeks done before we start so if he slacks off a little he wont have to worry about his adoring public freaking out about missing a week, hehe.

I think it’s time for a rant %) Ok so I have this friend online, a very good friend, but he tends to be a pathological liar, a trait I have found among far too many people online. Now i’ve known this about him for quite some time… tried to overlook it but it just gets to be too much sometimes. I ended up completely pushing him away because I cant stand being lied to. I sorta started thinking about this when I was listening to some old Ani DiFranco mp3 that I have “As Is” … S’about loving someone just as they are, not because of lies they tell to better themselves. About having no delusions about how a person really is, and loving them in spite of that. I personally have flaws, tons of them, I could go on for days telling you what’s wrong with my personality.. and I am ready to accept the same sort of things in friends and family that I love because no one is perfect. So it really bothers me when people won’t admit to what they really are…even after I tell them they dont have to be anything superhuman for me to care about them. I’m not sure if it’s because they arent accepted so much in real life, or because it’s just so easy to lie online, or whether they are simply insecure about themselves… but I just wish for once that some of these people who lie would just stop and be themselves. I’ve talked to several people who come into #13thHour that no “RPG Character” could ever be as cool or interesting as a real person. That people don’t have to put on a false face to come online and “be cool” … it’s the most geniune people that are treasured and loved. Of course lying and impressing people could create a following, admirers… but when you log off at night you KNOW that isn’t really you they love and you hate yourself for it. I’m not saying something should be done about it, I’m just complaining that people are silly to think they are worthless and boring. And I’m ashamed that even this friend of mine still sees fit to lie to me, even after I’ve made all this clear to him *sigh*

Hmmm… I’m definately in a ranting mood %) But complaining too much in one day will put me in a bad mood so I’ll stop here… S’already a long entry.. I should go get some work done %)

I hate it when my browser crashes in the middle of an entry in here… *ugh* anyway, it’s friday… it’s seems like the week went by pretty quickly for me, I’m glad its the weekend tho %) Yesterday I ended up working on my neopets page (the eveey one, www.neopets.com/~eveey ).. then i submitted it to the webpage contest there… it’d be kewl if it won, the pages that win end up getting like 10000 hits.. I also tried to work on my mst3k page a little, but while trying to design a logo I just got bored ’cause I couldnt think of anything good… So I read in this perl book I have for a little bit… and wrote a couple short emails. It was pretty much a boring day. I did get a stomach ache and headache last night tho %( it sucked, ended up watching tv then going to bed earlyish (around 10:30) … I felt better this morning, but from about 4 am on I was tossing and turning in bed, I shouldnt go to sleep so early %(

Bleh… I dont feel like writing anymore, have nothing to write anyway…

I got an email from my sister, I guess my father got back from the hospital yesterday.. she said “he seems to be doing fine” it’s still all very strange and I’m sure I’ll never hear the whole story as to what happened. I guess my Aunt Meg is up there now taking care of things, cleaning up the house, etc… and my grandparents are going to help with the bills. So hopefully things will work out well. At least I’m not so worry anymore…

So yesterday I got a Magic:The Gathering page up on my website, you can see it here. It’s pretty cool I guess, I have a couple of my old decks up there…and a bunch of scanned cards. Yesterday I also started looking at some perl scripting for The GIMP (the image editing program developed for linux). It’s really interesting, there is a kewl “perl server” in GIMP that allows you to run a script as a normal unix run command from a prompt ./scriptname.pl … and it’ll launch it in gimp. This makes it much easier to test a script %) I dunno if I’ll pursue working on gimp scripts, but it would be a kewl way to learn more perl %)

I dunno what I’ll do today, maybe work on the mst3k part of my site.. I started it a while back and never ended up doing anything with it *shrugs* or maybe I’ll work on something else… In any event it’s a nice day out, so I’ll most definately take a walk.. even though the grass was just mowed here and I am sneezing like crazy, stupid allergies! I hate the spring/summer %( So anyway, yeah i’m off..

aww my little premium trial is gone, oh well… I’m not gonna pay what they were asking for the few services it provided, besides I’m poor.

Yesterday turned out to be not so cool. I got a call from the cousin of mine that lives down here in philly, and apparently my father is in the hospital again. No one is quite sure what exactly happened, and for some time they didn’t even know where he was.. still arent completely sure since the hospital he said he was at isnt saying anything… its a really messed up situation and has me really worried. I guess part of it is the whole “growing up and seeing you’re elders’ weaknesses” thing. It’s been really hard seeing my father go downhill with his health, and it’s mostly his fault… I feel frustrated an angry that he’s not taking care of himself the way he should. There is nothing I can do about it though, so I shouldnt get so stressed out about it, but like I mentioned previously in another post, I can’t really help it! *sigh* I guess I will just wait and see what happens with this all.

Next week my cousin is going up to see her parents in NH, she offered to drive me up to maine to see my family. I guess most of my dad’s family is really wanting me to go up there, but I dunno… Myk couldnt come of course because he has work, and I’d miss him so much… plus I am not sure I want to see my family again so soon… but then I think I am not sure when the next chance to go up would be. I dunno… if I do go up I know I’ll have a miserable time seeing my father in that condition… I could see my friend Leslie from high school if I go up there, gah, I dunno.. I should really make up my mind soon, since i’d be leaving like, sunday or monday. I am so indecisive %(

Hmm what else… ohyeah, one of my ex boyfriends is a father now. His wife has a son on July 5th… I’m happy for him, just hope things work out for him and his wife (see, he’s 30 and she’s 19…). And it’s good to see that all my ex’s arent complete fucking psychos… I had really low self esteem ok!? At least I finally saw the light and went after the guy I had had a crush on forever %)

I guess that’s it for now, I am working on part of my webpage, a new Magic The Gathering page about the 2 years I played Magic, and posting pics of my cards that arent worth a freaking thing and I spent lots of money on… ho hum.. %)

So it’s noonish, another day when I am doing pretty much nothing… *sigh* I feel so worthless %) Oh I did get those 4th of July pics up tho… heh, after all that waiting I get a camera full of fuzzy pics. The camera used to work better, I swear! Stupid cheap digital camera… Oh well there are some ok pics, so they’re up if anyone is interested, which I doubt, I only write this weblog thing for myself anyway, hehehe.

4th Of July LAN Pictures

Anyway, I think I am gonna go play with my neopets webpages.. ’cause I wanna add more stuff before I enter one of them into the webpage contest.. *wanders off*

Well I’m back. I didn’t end up doing anything meaningful today. I dont think I got any work done, but I guess that’s the way mondays always are.. If I dont have specific direction I just end up wandering around in circles aimlessly trying to spend the time left of the day. I did stumble upon an interesting site in my travels however:

http://www.geekissues.org/quotes/


It’s an IRC quote site, you submit funny quotes from irc and they are weeded through, and the funniest ones are put up on the site. I went looking through them, and on a whim did a search for my nickname… and there was actually a quote from me!! Ahh… I have a terrible friend out there %) … want to know the quote? Bleh! Go there and see for yourself, search for “PrincessLeia2” … anyway, I submitted a few this morning from the #13thHour quotes pages, some of my favorite funny ones. So that was about an hour of fun %)

Later I was sitting in #13thHour, minding my own business when this guy comes in and pm’s me saying he just wanted to ask me a question. I was like “ok, shoot” and he goes “Where are they hiding all of the wonderfully talented and amazing geek women these days?” At this point I was like “ugh” and my hand was moving toward the kick button. The last thing I needed was some perv being obsessed with me again. But I left him go on, and made it quite clear that I had a boyfriend. He turned out to be a really nice guy, and messaged me ’cause he liked my site and wanted to invite me to a LAN party. Apparently he lives in a town like 15 minutes away, and is arranging this SummerFest LAN party at a cabin in his town. I guess he was looking for gamers in the area to randomly invite, and he was bored so was looking for people to talk to. So he invited me, and Myk of course, and as many people as I can gather up to go play at a lan party in like 2 weeks. It’s a whole weekend thing, sounds pretty cool %) I’ll talk to Myk about it, maybe we’ll end up going… Anyway, I guess this guy found my webpage and my usual haunts (#13thHour on the scifi server) through ICQ pages… which I rarely update, but just happened to last month. So he’s on my ICQ now, and I have his email addy, if anything meeting new people is kewl, and even if we can’t go to this LAN party it’d be cool to hang out sometime, someone in real life, wow. Then again he IS my age… older by only about a month or so, and he loves games n stuff… does php and sql stuff for his page, I’d have a hard time convincing Myk that it was strictly friendship, bleh %( I hate being a girl geek sometimes. Oh well, Myk is just gonna have to see one of these days that I’m absolutely crazy about him, and my interests just happen to be more common among men than women. Really, if I could find a woman who shared my interests she’d prolly be my best friend, but it’s just highly unlikely… most the geek girls I have ever met didn’t want other female friends, and didn’t want to share all the attention they got from men… ho hum.

Moving on, something really strange happened this weekend that I keep meaning to mention but keep forgetting about. On saturday, Myk’s birthday, I went outside to take the trash out (it was Myk’s birthday, I didnt want him doing it, hehe), and it was all foggy out, which isnt too abnormal, but it smelled like smoke. I came back into the apartment and told Myk, and he just thought I was being silly til he went out and smelled and saw it. We just shrugged and assumed someone had a BBQ or something AND there was fog. So sunday I was wandering around Yahoo! And came to the weather, the current forcast gave a tempurature and instead of a “partly cloudy” or “raining” or “sunny” picture on the current conditions it had “Smoke”.. I all of a sudden remembered how weird it was outside on saturday and then I noticed the severe weather report… it turns out the report was about the smoke! Apparently here have been big fires up in Quebec, and the smoke has been drifting as far south as the carolinas. Noew I am sure this is not new to people who keep up with News and stuff, but I don’t %) … It’s just so weird. I guess today most of it’s gone away, that’s what the weather report said, and when I stepped out for a bit today it seemed to be gone… but it was quite strange while it lasted %)

Hmmm… oh I’m almost done with the 4th book in that 5 book David Eddings series, I have about 40 pages left… I’ll probably finish that tonight… it’s a really good story, yes, this from the formally “science fiction not fantasy!” fan… and I am gonna read the 3rd Wheel Of Time book next… bleh, what’s become of me? hehe… I think I am gonna start shopping at discount book stores though, with how quickly I am getting through books, even spending half the price for a used book would be worth it, I dont *need* my books to be new… and I’m used to trading in old books that i’ve read for new ones, that’s what I had to do all through high school while my mother did everything in her power to discourage me reading (she is a weird mother…. she’d say stuff like “why do you need more books? you havent even read the ones you have!” … why do I need more books?! That’s a silly question, arent parents supposed to support their children’s reading habits?? oh well…). Anyway, yeah, discount bookstores.

Ah something else I remembered I kept meaning to write about (uh this post is getting pretty long… I think I found out why I worry about anything and everything so much, or at least an excuse… It seems to run in the family, the Krumbach side. I was talking to my cousin, who lives down here, recently and she was talking about how she was worrying so much about her job, and then joked about how she worrys about everything way too much and goes crazy ’cause he boyfriend just doesnt seem to care most of the time. Then she said that her mother is the same way, my aunt was all stressed out ’cause she’s worried about little things that she cant do anything about. And that’s when I was like “so that’s where I get it from!” My unnaturally insane size of my worry load is genetic, lol… ok so it’s probably a mental thing, that’s not healthy, but at least I have an explaination for it (other than I’m friggin crazy)…

Well I guess I’m gonna go play with my neopets or something ’cause that’s what I do when I’m bored… Myk should be home within an hour anyway, I’ll prolly make spagetti since we dont have much else, ugh and I hate grocery shopping %( Oh well… I’m out.

Well I never did get around to writing any emails yesterday… but I did get my chat client to match my email client! Looks really kewl noew :

(click to see larger, 89k, screenshot)


So yeah, I played with colors a lot %) I also changed the way my first terminal is too… the one when I boot up, it’s so pretty noew %) hehe.

It ended up being a really nice weekend in all, I had fun %) Oh and we watched adult swim last night on cartoon network… new eps of harvey birdman, that show is so funny, hehe. And there were episodes of other kewl shows on there that I hadnt seen before, so that was kewl.. the brak show, sealab 2021, aqua teen hunger force… I went to bed around 12, read for a while, and thinking that Myk would come to bed any minute I started to try to go to sleep around 1ish… But of course I tossed and turned til at least 2:30… and Myk still wasnt in bed when I ended up falling asleep… see I seem to move around a lot when I go to sleep, so it’s better if I am at least REALLY relaxed or actually asleep when he comes to bed, so I dont bother him. Anyway, I guess he ended up going to bed around 3ish… then he got up before 6, hardly any sleepy %( Stupid neighbors upstairs decided to be extra noisy with their getting ready this morning, heh… So I ended up getting up when he left around 7:30… and I’m actually *not* tired, prolly ’cause this weekend my sleep schedule was so messed up, and I slept too much, hehe.

Right, so we went to that BBQ/LAN party this past 4th of July, and we took like 30 or so pics… and I said I’d get them posted, but we couldnt find the usb cable for the camera all weekend. So last night while I was trying to go to sleep one of the things I thought about what where it could be, so this morning I went looking for it in the places I thought of… and lo and behold I found it. Of course then I couldnt find the camera! I thought this was due to the universe being against me, (and this still might be true) but it turns out Myk took the camera to work, thinking the cable was at work, DOH!!! So I still dont have pictures. Tomorrow tho, I will have them tomorrow *knocks on wood*

I dunno what I’ll do today… Maybe work on my site a bit since it’s been neglected for the time I was playing with new r2’s perl script for xchat… which is up and running pretty well btw, I’m really impressed. There are some more things I could do with it of course, but I wanted to get it up and running. Maybe I’ll look into porting it to irssi today… or maybe I’ll spend the day writing emails *shrugs* For noew I’m gonna go grab some breakfast.